ELIUS and I were friends in our bachelor days. He had been in the army, and I naturally looked up to him. He had an idea that he was an austere man, and was fond of referring to his severity. He used to say, "I always boss the ranch." He had been a brave soldier, and I had no reason to doubt his courage on any point. His was one of those natures whose freshness is preserved by its own quality, and though past middle life, he was a man about town, a toast with every one, and had a reputation for coolness if not for anything more. He used to foster the idea with me that he was impudent to women. I never knew that it rendered him unpopular with them. "They like it, sir," he used to say. "All women are slaves, and need a master."

This was his condition when we went to live in the second floor of Mrs. Trouville's little house. Mrs. Trouville had been a friend

of his in his youth, when she was in good circumstances, before the war. She was now a sorrowful little widow, slim, refined, and delicate, with the remains of her beauty not quite faded, and with a look in her face and a tone in her voice which were pathetic. I believe that Relius went to live there because she was so poor, though the reason he assigned to me for our move was that Patsy, with whom he made the arrangement, satisfied him that the rooms were the best in town, and that we could not do so well anywhere else. Patsy was Mrs. Trouville's maid, and, I believe, her cook also, though of this I was never sure. She was small, thin, elderly, ladylike, of a dark walnut brown, and as near a copy of Mrs. Trouville as she could make herself. She moved with a tread as soft as a black cat's, spoke in a tone as low as a whisper, and wore an old black silk dress of Mrs. Trouville's that had been turned more than once. In fact, she copied Mrs. Trouville as faithfully as she served her.

I observed shortly after we moved in that Patsy treated Relius and me differently. Mrs. Trouville treated us with entire impartiality, being equally kind to both of us, and watchful for our comfort; but Patsy's manner was not the same to us. She brought Relius hot water in the morning, looked after his linen, put his shirt buttons into his dress shirts, and placed pillow-shams on his pillows; whilst I shaved cold when I could not wait for Relius's can, looked after my own shirts, and did without pillow - shams. At table she would say to Relius, "More waffles, Mr. Relius?" or, "Another cup of coffee, Mr. Relius?" in a tone hardly above a whisper, but full of quiet interest. I mentioned this to Relius, but he scouted the idea, and declared that I was of an envious nature. If there was a difference, he said it was because he treated Patsy with more severity than I did. "You must hold a woman up to her duty, sir," he said. "You must boss the ranch."

This sedulous care extended. Patsy came to exercise a certain supervision over Relius. She saw that he had on his overshoes in snowy weather, or she at least placed them out for him with a constancy which could not be unnoticed. She never said anything; she only looked. Relius became gradually careful how he omitted acting on these un

mistakable suggestions. She took to sitting up for him if she knew he was out, just as she did for Mrs. Trouville. Once or twice, on very inclement evenings, he actually, in view of Patsy's silent presence, gave up the idea of going out. He gradually took to dressing very quickly, and slipping out very quietly, in a way that I could not understand, till once I thought I heard him, in answer to a question from Patsy in the hall, tell her that he was not going out, and afterwards found him dressing. I taxed him with it, but he assured me that I was mistaken, which I was willing to admit. At any rate, he slipped out of the house hurriedly, whilst I went out at my leisure; indeed, more slowly than I wished, because I could not find my pet shirt studs, and had to put up with a broken set. As I passed Patsy on the steps, I told her I wanted her to hunt for the buttons. She made no reply, as usual. We came home together, Relius and I, after a very jolly evening, where Relius had been the life of the party; and he, with his usual considerateness, cautioned me against making any noise, and tripped hastily up the stairs, giving a single glance down over the banisters into the darkness below.

A day or two afterwards he asked me with much concern what in the world I had said to Patsy. I could remember nothing. He said Mrs. Trouville had told him that I had said something to Patsy which had deeply offended her; that Patsy had never before been so spoken to, and that her honesty was above question. I recalled the shirt studs, and said I had never dreamed of accusing her of stealing them, and that I would tell her so. He said no; that he thought he had better settle it, which he would do with Mrs. Trouville, and that anyhow it was just as well to keep her up to her duty. I let him do as he pleased.

A short time after this I came home one night and found Relius dressing for a ball. He was nearly dressed, and was rummaging in a drawer, raking the things angrily backwards and forwards, and using very strong language about "that little fool nigger" who would not let things stay where he put them. Finally he asked me to lend him my stud buttons. I complied, and my generosity moved him to ask me to tell "that fool nigger" after be was gone that he wanted her to find his buttons, and to let them alone thereafter. I promptly refused, and asked him if he was afraid to tell her himself.

"Afraid!" he said, with contempt; he only thought that as Patsy was already down on me, it might be better, if we were going to continue to live there, that she should be kept in a good humor with at least one of us; but as to "afraid," he would show me that he always bossed his ranch. I heard Patsy let him out, but he said nothing about the buttons.

The next morning I was dressing in my room when I heard Relius talking. I looked in at his door. He was curled up under the cover, and his eyes were fast shut. He was

talking, I supposed, in his sleep. I listened. He was saying: "Patsy, I have unfortunately mislaid my stud buttons. I wish you would hunt for them." The tone was too placid to please him; he began again, on a higher key: "Patsy, my shirt studs have got mislaid; I want you to hunt for them." This did not satisfy him either, and he began again, quite sternly: "Patsy, what in the devil have you done with my shirt studs ? Get them for me, and hereafter let them alo-"

Just then the door opened, and Patsy entered, silent as a shadow. Relius shut up like a clam. Patsy moved about, opened the windows, lit the fire, and fixed his water. I watched through the crack of the door. Just as she was going out, Relius yawned, stretched, and opened his eyes as if just waking up.

"Oh, Patsy," he said, in the softest and most insinuating of tones, "if you should happen to come across any shirt buttons on the floor today when you are sweeping, will you please put them up on my bureau for me?"

"Yes, sir," said Patsy, as she passed silently

out.

Waiting breathless, until she must be down the stairs, Relius shouted: "Aha! did you hear that? Who says I am afraid of Patsy? Do you see how I boss the ranch ?"

When he learned that I had seen, he bought two sets of buttons, and gave me one.

THOMAS NELSON PAGE.

A MODEST CONTRIBUTOR. FOUR or five ladies bustled into Mr. Munn's

private office the other day.

"What can I do for you, ladies?" he asked, pleasantly.

"Why, Mr. Munn," began one of the visitors, "we are taking up a subscription, and we knew you wouldn't like it if we didn't give you an opportunity to subscribe."

Mr. Munn bowed graciously, and asked: "And the object? Of course it is a worthy one, or you would not be interested in it."

66

"Yes, sir," replied the spokeswoman, we think it a very worthy object. It is to build a home for aged and indigent widows."

"Excellent! Excellent! I shall take pleasure in making you out a check."

"Oh, how lovely of you, Mr. Munn!" exclaimed the spokeswoman when she received the bit of paper and read the amount-one thousand dollars. "Oh, we didn't expect to get that much from you! We are ever so much obliged."

"So good of him!" and similar exclamations were heard as the check was passed around for the admiration of the party.

"But, Mr. Munn," said the lady who handled the check last, "you haven't signed it."

"That is because I do not wish my benefactions known to the world," said Mr. Munu, modestly. "I wish to give the check anony. mously." And he bowed the ladies out with great dignity. WILLIAM HENRY SIVITER.

RIGHT AT HOME.

WITHIN a mile or two of one of the smaller towns of Nova Scotia there resided for a number of years a gentleman by the name of Quagmarsh. He was a very eccentric old fellow, and though rather taciturn by nature, when he did have anything to say it was generally cogent and to the point. Soon after coming to M, Mr. Quagmarsh invested several thousand dollars in the purchase of an utterly worthless farm, which the owner, a member of the ubiquitous family of Brown, represented to him as a veritable Garden of Eden.

Now farming on a piece of land that has little drainage, either natural or artificial, lacks the elements of success. People therefore were not surprised when, after a couple of years of zealous hard work, the planter assigned, gave up farming as a profession, and accepted an agency in a large insurance busiA short time after these events Quagmarsh happened to meet the author of all his

ness.

"Ah, yes; but, you see, the late rains-" "And that it was the best farm in the neighborhood for raising oats?"

"Yes, I believe I did say something like that, though the oat crop varies greatly."

"And that the soil was specially adapted for potatoes?"

"So it was at one time; but every soil requires a change of diet, so to speak."

And that it was entirely free from rocks?" "Well, not entirely."

"And that you were accustomed to raise seventy barrels of apples and from twenty to thirty tons of hay annually ?”

"Oh, I admit that was an exaggeration." "Well, Mr. Brown, I won't call you a liar, but if I were to see you coming down the street with Ananias on one side of you and Sapphira on the other, I would say that you were in the bosom of your family."

NATIVE THRIFT.

IN a certain Cape Cod town a movement to build a casino was started last summer. It was thought advisable to interest the natives in the project, because the inaugurators were anxious to secure a site at as low a figure as possible. Accordingly the owner of the particular site which they had in view, a native named, of course, Boffin, was made a member of the building and finance committee. After some preliminary discussion at the first meeting, the two summer visitors on the committee broached the question of contributions. Boffin did not leave them in any doubt as to his position on this question. He positively declined to contribute a cent. Then they labored with him over the site. Fifteen hundred dollars was his lowest figure. They explained to him the advantages which would accrue to the

Mr.

AN ANECDOTE OF WASHINGTON.

SOMEWHERE up in Vermont there used to live a character, L- by name, who furnished amusement for his entire neighborhood. He behind him a very green memory, and a fund has long since passed away, but he has left of good stories about his experiences during the Revolution, in which he fought as a soldier for the colonies. As he grew older, his imagination as to things that happened and a great many that did not happen-during that There was one of his yarns that was a great period of strife grew more and more active. favorite with the old man, and he used to tell it with the greatest unction and air of this effect: General Washington wanted some profound candor. His story was about to very important despatches carried to General Lafayette, but the trip was so perilous that he hesitated to order any one upon the duty. So he went out in front of a line of men, and explaining the situation to them, asked for a volunteer. For a minute or two no one moved, then, says L, "I just stepped out three paces, and tipping my hat, said, 'I'm your man, Mr. Washington!" Then he went on the trip, according to his chronicling, and after braving many perils, returned safely to camp. He went immediately to the General's tent, and reported the successful accomplishment of his errand. Just at this point in his story the old man would wax eloquent, and say: "The General he said that he thought as how I was as plucky and as brave and as able a man as he'd ever see; and he ended by takin' off his sword and his belt, and he handed 'em to me, sayin' as how as I was so much braver than him I'd earned the right to wear 'em instead of him. He thought as how I was so much more fitten for sich honor than him, an' he wanted me to take his place."

It was a favorite trick of the old man to stop just at this interesting point, until some one asked, as some one always did, "What did you say to him, Mr. L—?”

Then the grizzled soldier would draw himself up to his full height, and reply, with his voice ringing with pride, "I says to him, says I, 'Mr. Washington, you're a better eddicated man than I am; you keep 'em yourself.'"

G. A. LYON, JUN.