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CHAP. IX.

This love to the appearing of our Lord further described in three other fruits or marks of it.

VIII.

AND now can any soul choose but think of that perpetually which it most dearly loves? Doth not every good use to present itself continually to the mind that is enamoured of it, and remember us of its beauty? There is no question to be made of it. The very ardency of our affection for it doth more imprint and engrave it on our mind; and when, by any participation of it, we feel how good it is, we press it harder, and sink it deeper into our hearts. There is no man, for instance, who hath settled his love upon an agreeable person, but he finds the image of that friend always before his eyes: it accompanies him every where, and cleaves inseparably to his thoughts: it is a great part of his pleasure to entertain himself with the shadow of that in which he hath lodged his heart.

And therefore if we love the appearing of our Lord, we shall solace ourselves often with the kind. In the multitude, especially, or tumult of our thoughts within us, (as the Psalmist speaks,) the comforts of it will delight our souls". We shall be daily calling upon them, and exhorting them to look towards it, and to fix their thoughts and affections upon it. We shall be inclined to say, as the voice is in the Song of Songs, Come, my fair one, come away.

O my chiefest good, what shall I desire or wish for so much. as for thy coming? What is it that I ever saw which should detain my eyes from thy incomparable beauty? or where can I expect to satisfy their hunger, but only with the filling sight of thee, at thy appearing? The spacious heavens hope to be filled with the majesty of thy glory. The sun is but a weak image of thy brightness, and will be content to go out to make room for thee when thou appearest. All the stars of light are ready to resign their places, and leave the sky to be illuminated by thee alone. Whatsoever is lovely, and surprises us with its

z Psalm xciv. 19.

beauty here, confesses it is but thy shadow, and that when thou breakest forth it must disappear.

Fix my mind therefore upon thy glory, and let it henceforth employ my busy thoughts. Possess thyself, O Lord of life and glory, entirely of this heart, which hath been too long estranged from thee. Impress such a lively sense of thee and of thy glory there, that I may sooner forget myself than thee and thy appearing. Make it my greatest pleasure to sit hours and days and years to think of thy so much desired coming. When I meet with my dearest relations and friends, let nothing entertain us with such delight as to think of being caught up together in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air.

Let us love to speak of the glory of thy kingdom, and to talk of thy power; to utter abundantly the memory of thy great goodness, and to sing of thy righteousness. Let us wish with united hearts to see thy power and glory, and to behold thee coming, according to thy faithful promise, out of thy heavenly sanctuary. Let it be our sweetest joy to inspire each other's hearts with these holy hopes, and to stir up one another to love and to good works. And when thou comest, O Lord, may every one of us be found so doing.

IX.

These are some of the pantings of an heart which loves and bears in mind the appearing of Christ. For, to say the truth, love is the original and source of all the passions that we feel in our hearts. They all flow from this as from their springhead. They are but several motions which have their rise from love: or, if you will so conceive it, nothing but different figures and shapes wherein it appears. It is love which fears, and love which grieves, and love which hopes, and love which rejoices there would be none of these were it not for some good which we love; to which these and all the rest of their kindred owe their birth and nourishment. When this is hindered in its designs, it breeds anger, or impatience, or fear, or sadness, or some such like commotion: and when this succeeds and prospers in the pursuance of its ends, their arises hope, and contentment, and joy and gladness, as the natural issue of it.

They that love then Christ's appearing will fear nothing so

much as to lose the blessedness which he will bring along with him. Nothing will excite such a displeasure in their hearts, as that evil which would rob and defraud them of his favour at that happy day. And what is there that can give them such a touch of sadness, as the thought that they are so far distant from their dearest Lord? Or what can create such joy, such exultation of spirit, as to hope they shall one day see him, so as never to part from him any more? In one word, all the passions of their souls will run this way, and be concerned for nothing so highly as this, that they may be presented faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy.

True indeed, O blessed Saviour, (doth such an heart meditate in itself,) I have had a thousand fears in my breast. I have dreaded every small danger in this world, as if it would prove my utter ruin. The terrors that have affrighted me are as innumerable as the things I have fancied to be my happiness. But now all these are willing to be gone, that they may make way for one greater fear; lest I should not enter with thee, when thou appearest, into thy rest. O prevent so intolerable a mischief! Whatsoever I lose, I shall account myself a gainer if I lose not the blessing which thou wilt give us. Take all if thou pleasest, I am content, so thou wilt give me a share in thy glory when thou comest.

I have been too long pestered with a world of sensual passions. Sometimes sadness hath oppressed me, and then anger hath set me all on fire. Now vain joys have swelled my heart and puffed me up; and again they have given place to grief, and sorrow hath shrunk up my soul, and dried up my spirit. Fears and hopes have tossed me up and down as in a tempestuous sea. A small matter hath created me much trouble; and I have longed for things, which promised much, but gave me little satisfaction. What a comfort is it but to expect the day which will settle and compose these tumults in perpetual peace and quiet! I feel the thoughts of it already appeasing my spirit, and bringing a calm into my breast. And if the brightness of thy appearing did but always shine in my mind, it would dispel all the clouds and scatter the darkness wherein all this confusion reigns. O let the splendour of that day irradiate my soul even at this distance from it; and leave no space

void of its light and comfort. Yea, let it eclipse all other joys; and by its glistering beauty cause the small contentments of this world to seem but as so many glow-worms, which shine only in the night. I am sensible how short the sweetest enjoyments of this life are of that celestial happiness. The society of my Saviour and of the inhabitants above, O how much is it to be preferred, even before the delightful company of those that most deserve my love! who can do me no greater service than, by the innocent passion I have for them, to transport me with far greater to that blessed country where I shall enjoy them without fear, and love them without danger. And O that all the fears I at any time have of losing the dearest creature in this world may presently expire into a greater fear of being separated from my Lord. Let all my hopes and joys also about that conclude in better hopes and joyful expectations of living together in the joy of our Father's house.

But as for other things, I discharge and renounce you, all you frivolous sinful delights. I am not afraid of any evil that man or other creature can do unto me, while my trust and my joy is in the Lord. Come troubles, come reproaches, come loss of goods; I am not angry at it, so Jesus will but come: and they will also excite me to fasten mine eyes more steadfastly on him and his appearing. This is my hope, this is my joy, this is the support and the satisfaction of my heart. This is the thing I am resolved to entertain my thoughts withal: and if I but have this, let all the rest, O blessed Jesus, be even as thou pleasest.

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X.

I have but one thing more to add, which is, that the love which deserves this character is a settled constant affection; an habit and temper of the soul which always abides: not a sudden fit of passion, but a fixed inclination and rooted disposition to seek such a good as it desires. And so the word here used by St. Paul signifies, not barely they that love, but they that have loved his appearing. For nyanηkóσ, being in the time perfectly past, denotes that this hath been the steadfast bent of their hearts to look for Christ, and prepare themselves in this manner for his coming.

The image of any lovely person, when it first presents itself

before us, is wont to come in a posture of humility and submission; and seems to crave to be admitted into our hearts. It invites us with so much sweetness and respect, as if it would be beholden to us for our kind acceptance of it into our favour. But when it is once passionately entertained, and hath possessed itself of our hearts, we find it changes its behaviour, and grows so imperious, that it requires what before it seemed to entreat. It becomes absolute master of our hearts; and placing itself there as the governor of all our affections, will no more be denied in any of its demands.

And such is the progress of the love of Christ, and his appearing in pious souls. He comes and entreats us at the first, or rather beseeches us that we would be so sensible of his kindness as to let him have a room in our hearts, and to receive from his hands so great a good as he offers to bless us withal. We feel thereupon only some inclinations to him, and good affections for him; but do not come presently to a full resolution to surrender ourselves entirely to him. Nay, it is too manifest that we are off and on, (as the phrase is,) and seem as if we could choose whether we will love him or no. But when he hath once got within us, when we perceive how gracious the Lord is, and have opened our hearts to let him dwell there, then he exercises an absolute empire over us. He will have none of his commands refused or disputed. A ready and cheerful compliance with his will is the fruit of his authority and nothing can have a room there but what shall ask him leave. He rules and reigns over us in so sovereign a manner, that he carries us whither he pleases. And more than that, it pleases us to be ruled by him, and it is the most perfect liberty to be under the uncontrollable power of his love. All the world cannot hinder him from being obeyed; but every signification of his will and pleasure to us becomes a law as strong as fate, which cannot be resisted. Let him ask what he will, it is sufficient that he is pleased; and that he loves us so much as to think of appearing again to make us perfectly like himself.

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That is a good incomparably great, which needs nothing to procure our love to it, but only to be known: and when it is loved, needs nothing to secure it, but not to slip out of our mind. Or rather, we cannot forget what we have once so dearly

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