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notice in this place that the year of the Magazine is the “returns” constitute a great stumbling-block, nearly coming to a close, and the present is the most and are the cause of much travail and putting tofavorable of all seasons to extend its circulation. In gether of heads. every hamlet and village and city we have friends This is the case in the —th Illinois. Perhaps no who know its value, and the pleasure it brings into braver set of officers can be found in the service; every household on its monthly visits. To make it but of some of the localities in Suckerdom representa great national institution, carrying "instruction ed by them the schoolmaster has been shamefully with delight” to hundreds of thousands of American negligent. Now, each return is properly accompahomes, the publishers have made its terms to clubs nied by a “letter of advice," addressed to the chief so easy that the whole community may share in its of ordnance at Washington, setting forth that, from blessings. Making money is one of the good things a certain place, on a certain date, the required docuthat most men aim at; but there is a higher good ments were forwarded by the subscribing officer. and larger pleasure which we would seek in pressing The-th Illinois was originally armed with the our friends to make the Magazine a guest in every Harper's Ferry and Springfield muskets, altered from family around them. One of our literary and reli- flint-lock to percussion. At first the boys were disgious newspapers, venerable for its age and princi- satisfied; they would have preferred a more “ fancy ples, says that it is impossible to buy so much good arm;" but after having participated in two or three reading for so little money as it costs to get Harper's engagements, their old smooth-bores doing them Monthly Magazine ; and when we intimate, as we good service, they became attached to their guns, may safely do, that what you give twenty-five cents and cared no longer to trade them off. for costs three thousand dollars and more, you will It so happened that at the end of the second quarsee that our pious friend is not out of the way in his ter of 1863 Jerry B, who had been promoted figures. Turn to the last page of the cover of this from the position of Corporal to that of Secondnumber, and see the terms on which the Magazine Lieutenant of Company -, for good and soldierly is published and sent over the country, and you will conduct, found bimself in command of the Company, perhaps be stimulated to make a little effort among and thus it became necessary that he should make your neighbors and friends to get them into the en- out the quarterly returns. Now Jerry, faithful and
joyment that you and yours have found so pleasant brave, had not acquired much book learning, neither in years that are past.
did he possess much business experience; however, Twenty-six volumes of the Magazine are now after long cogitation, and no little erasing and blotbound up, and contain matter equal to two hundred ting, the returns were finished, ready for the mail, duodecimo volumes. They make an elegant libra- with the single exception of the “ letter of advice." ry, an unfailing source of entertaining and useful Here was a stickler! In what could he advise the reading, one of the most delightful repositories of august head of the Ordnance Bureau? It must be history, biography, tales, travels, poetry, sentiment, as to something connected with ordnance. Yes, and humor, that will be as full of interest fifty years certainly! Suddenly a bright thought illuminated hence as now. The man who keeps the key of the Jerry's brain. He remembered Fredericktown, DonDrawer advises all his readers to have the Magazine elson, and Shiloh; the evidences of the effectiveness from the beginning, and he is sure they will take it of our smooth-bores rose before his happy vision, to the end.
and he forthwith indited an epistle to General R
at Washington, advising him to allow "nothing but ONE of our Vermont friends, in writing to the Harper's Ferry or Springfield muskets to be used in Drawer, relates an incident of a serio-comic charac- the army!" Poor Jerry! Enfield rifles are now in ter that must have a place in our pages :
the hands of our men, and the glory of “smoothIn - Vermont, there lives an old lady of great bores" has departed. religious excitability, and it may be that her “intellex" are a little sprung. She had listened to a From Boston we have a letter mentioning the sermon on the service of God and Mammon, and got following incident: the thing a good deal mixed up; but with a very A few years ago, when the “ Norfolk House” was strong impression that Mammon was the god of this in full operation, kept by our friend Rist, now in world, and therefore to be served while she was here. Elliot Street, among his boarders was one French, As soon as the sermon was ended she rose from her an old gentleman known and beloved by every one. seat, and in a clear, shrill voice, that rang through He was an original character. Any one getting the house, she said,
much ahead of him had to be an early riser. One "Brethren and sisters, I have often followed after evening, just after an arrival of a steamer from old the Evil One, but from this time onward I mean to England, the sitting-room being well filled with the serve that good old Mammon as long as I live !" good people of this village, a young gent entered,
and by his pompous airs soon attracted the attention One of our army correspondents writes : of all present, among the rest our venerated friend,
Among the other arduous duties that devolve upon who made the inquiry of the stranger, " if he was a the “shoulder-strapped” gentry, and of which a ma- native of Boston?" jority of the good people at home know nothing, is "Oh no," was the reply; “I have just arrived that of making out quarterly returns of ordnance and from Hingland: thought I would just come over for ordnance stores, accounting for every rifle, cartridge- a few weeks ; but expect to be very lonesome." box, belt, sling, pouch, etc., that may have been re- Conversation ensued between the two, and our ceived during the quarter by the commandant of a foreign friend soon inforined the company that he company, or other officer responsible for the safe had just received the title of F.R.S. keeping of the same. These returns are, to new be- “What does that stand for?" inquired French. ginners, complex and difficult; and in the old regi. “Can it be possible that you are so ignorant in ments, where many commissions are held by men America as not to know?" answered John. who have fought their way up from the ranks, they “Wa'al, don't know; but here in America it may not having enjoyed great educational advantages, I mean differently than in England."
“I will enlighten you then," said Mr. Bull. " It band, which he was not inclined to do. She got designates a . Fellow of the Royal Society."" the "pass," however, and commenced packing her
" Thought so, thought so," repeated French. things preparatory to leaving. About this time the “Here it stands for a ‘Fellow of Remarkable Stu- news of the fall of Vicksburg came, and a horse, a pidity!""
very great favorite in the family, was taken violent
ly sick and his life despaired of. I was sitting one "I'll tell you," writes a war correspondent in afternoon in the parlor, having a social chat with Indiana to the Drawer, “how Wash Lichtiter was the daughters, when the mother came in looking converted from Secesh into a warm Union man. extremely dejected. Wash had been flogged once or twice for cheering “Ma,” asked the youngest daughter, "what is for Jeff Davis, but he stuck to his principles. One the matter?” day Morgan and his band of thieves came along, and “Oh dear, my daughter," she replied, at the same Wash gave them a cordial welcome. He brought time straightening herself up in her chair in a peout all the liquor he had and treated them well; culiar manner, which would have done honor to Mrs. told them how he loved the South, and hoped that Partington, "Vicksburg has fallen, Bell is going the Yankees would be whipped out. The banditti down South, the horse is going to die, and the dear then asked him for money. He begged off, but only knows what will come upon us next!" Morgan said, 'Come, old Butternut, shell out; we want all the spondulics you've got!'
From head-quarters of New York artillery, “Wash had to fork over, but was so slow about now on the “sacred soil,” we have the following it that the rascals pitched in and gave him a thrash- explanation of the origin of the name of a welling, and then carried off every thing he had. Wash known road in Maryland. Our correspondent writes: has gone in for a 'vigorous prosecution of the war' Over in Prince George's County, Maryland, there ever since, and is mighty glad that Morgan has gone is a private road leading from St. Barnabas's Church to State prison, where all such fellows belong." to the house of the Hon. James L. Addison. Many
years ago a gay party of ladies and gentlemen were A Boston correspondent tells us of a home-sick passing over this road on horseback, which, like all soldier on the Potomac. A Lieutenant found him other roads in that part of "My Maryland," bas a solitary and alone, weeping like a big booby boy. good deal of the up-hill and down-hill to it, with an “What's the matter ?"
occasional stone. The horse of one of the ladies, “Oh, I wish I was in my father's barn." stepping on one of the stones, accidentally stumbled, “And what would you do there ?"
when one of the gentlemen, wishing to show his “I would go into the house plaguy quick !" said progress in French, remarked in a loud tone to the the poor fellow, boo-hooing again at the rate of 2.40 lady, intending the whole party to hear, that her a minute.
horse came near throwing her by his "fox pass"
(faux pas). Ever since then this road has been A St. Louis correspondent says: Have you room known by the name of “Fox Pass.” in the Poultry Department for the following transcript of an epitaph ?
A FRIEND in Memphis, Tennessee, revives his “Here lies the remains of Thomas Woodhen—the most recollections of the Mackinaw country, and sends a amiable of husbonds, the most excellent of men.
story illustrating the way in which justice is admin“N.B. The name is Woodcok, but it would not come in istered in that latitude. A man named Webber, ryme."
hearing that a friend of his was in trouble, sent for
him to see if he could help him out, and found that A wag by the name of Tinker, in the class of he had been prosecuted by a neighbor. The only 1855 in College, will be remembered by his witness against him was an Indian claiming to be a classmates not only for his neglect of the mathe- half-breed, Indians not being allowed to testify in matics, but for his ready wit and power of quick the courts of Michigan. “We must try strategy repartee. In attempting to recite Prop. 5, Book I., upon that chap," said Webber. “You get a jug of of Euclid, called "Ass' Bridge,” he stumbled. At whisky, and we'll go over and see what can be done." a class meeting held soon after, when speeches were very soon after reaching the place where the court in order, a classmate, thinking to rally him on his was to be held Webber called the justice out for a failure, called out, "Tinker on the Pons asinorum!" little friendly talk, and to drink his health, which
Tinker replied at once, “I beg to be excused from they did several times. The Court getting so "she occupying the gentleman's platform.!"
understood herself pretty well,” the suit was called,
and the witness put upon the stand. Webber, apAn officer of the Sixteenth United States infantry pearing for the defense, made objection on the sends the following:
grounds of his being an Indian, and proceeded to DEAR DRAWER,- Did you ever hear of the town question him as follows: of Galena, Illinois, justly celebrated for its lead- WEBBER. “What was your grandfather and momines and pretty ladies? In this town resides a ther on your father's side ?" very interesting family, the father a native of New WITNESS. “My grandfader she half-breed; my England, the mother of Tennessee. The daughters, grandmoder he squaw." grown to womanhood, are accomplished and lovely. WEBBER. “That would make your father three The eldest daughter, Bell, married last fall a chap- quarters Indian, won't it? Will the Court please lain in a rebel Tennessee regiment, who, when the to put that down? And your mother's father, what rebels evacuated Murfreesboro, went with his regi- was he?" ment, leaving his wife to return home. The father WITNESS. “She full-blood Frenchman." is a loyal man, but the rest of the family are badly WEBBER. “And your mother's mother, what was "secesh." The married daughter, during the spring she?" and summer, was continually teasing her father to WITNESS. “He full-blooded squaw.” get her a “military pass," to go South to her hus- WEBBER. “Well, that makes your mother a halfbreed. Will the Court be so good as to put that and amazement, which Richard and Robin saw and down, and add it up, and see how much it makes?” marveled thereat. The seedy man tried to explain
“Five quarters," roared the judge. “Get out of to the liquor man, but in vain. It took his last this house! No five-quarter Indian can testify in dime to pay the shot. court. I give judgment against the plaintiff for cost, and fine him five dollars for insulting this court Two young ladies in Ridgefield, Fairfield County, by bringing that witness here to testify!"
Connecticut, send the following inscriptions from
tombstones in the old burial-ground of that beautiA SOLDIER in the Massachusetts infantry, writing ful town: to the Drawer, says:
"To her whose memory we record, The following took place in my presence.
The All words are wrote in vain; dramatis personæ are two Irishmen: one a robust, But to the living it affords hardy fellow, who might have been indulging in a Her age, and death, and where she's lain." “dhrop” previous, and who was boasting that he
"Remember this as you walk round, never ran in a fight yet, and who was very severe
All must return unto the ground; on those who practiced it; the other a younger,
For by transgression in the garden though strongly-built, black-eyed, good-looking fel
Adam did receive his warning: low, evidently bent on quizzing his comrade, and
And as God's word does prove true, trying to convince him that he is a great coward,
I have returned, and so must you." notwithstanding his asser ons to the contrary.
“Death, the great conqueror, has took my friend away, Young IRISHMAN. “Well, now, it's no use talk
Rest here, until the great judgment-day; in' any more about it; we all know you're a coward, No dropping tear or pardner's aching heart for what made you run at the Seven Days' Fight? Can secure from death's most cruel dart." -ah, now !”
OLD IRISHMAN. "It's a lie! Who iver said I A TRUE soldier writes to the Drawer from the ran? I've niver seen the day yit!”
fallen city of Vicksburg, and says: Y. I. “Oh, bosh, now! we know all about it. During the siege of this place Logan's division The inemy was at yer back and you run, you cow- erected in front of, and near to, the principal rebel ard ye, so ye did.”
fort a wooden tower for riflemen, which overlooked 0. 1. “It's a lie! and ye can't prove it! I al- part of the enemy's works. One day the Forty-fifth ways stood me ground. Here's a man that niver Illinois were on duty as sharp-shooters there, when yit—"
a man came into the tower whose common dress and Y. I. “Oh yis, I can prove it t'ye too. Ye all appearance led us to take him for one of your correrun like dous, an' you know it, for—"
spondents, or some private citizen on his travels. He 0. I. “Will, wait thin, an' I'll tell ye how it was, made his way to the top of the tower, and began to jist. You see, Jackson's corps came down upon us look over and survey the enemy's works, to the no -we were outnumbered, we were-Jackson come slight exposure of his own person. One of the riflethin-we were in Corcoran's Irish brigade, ye see, men occupying this post called out, in rough and and my regiment was the Sixty-first Ohio-the gal. commanding tones, "Get down off there! don't you lant Sixty-first and the Sixty-eighth-the Sixty- know any thing? You have no business here any eighth--"
way, and you'll get popped over in a minute, as sure Y. I. “New York?"
as a gun!" 0. I. “Yis, the Sixty-eighth New York—that The stranger finished his survey and very leisurewas the one-it broke"
ly retired from his post of observation. Hardly had Y. I. “Oh! ye lie, now! 'twas the one that saved he gone when a fellow-soldier asked the other, the whole of ye. You all broke an' run save that." “Do you know who that was?"
0. I. “It's not so! it's not so! Aisy, an' I'll tell “No, nor I don't care; some newspaper man, you. The Sixty-eighth New York broke in the mid- probably." dle--yis, Sir, it broke in the middle-an' thin the “Not by a long shot," replied the other ; “tbat's cav'lry rushed in and flanked us--the cav'lry flanked General Grant." us—and we were surrounded_"
“General Grant!" cried the rifleman ; and springY. I. “Yis, and thin ye run! ye run! ye r-r-run!” ing up he rushed out and overtook the General, and
0. I. (turning very red, and in a rage). “Thin humbly said, “I beg your pardon for speaking so; fuhat could we do but that!"
I thought it was a stranger who did not know the
danger.” RICHARD and Robin were two pretty men who "All right!" said the General, taking out his were caught in Bridgeport one night, and obliged to tobacco-box, and handing it to the soldier, asked spend three hours before the departure of the boat. him, “Do you chew ?" This led them to seek solace in a game of billiards. “Sometimes." And taking a soldier's "cud" he Ignorant of localities, they pressed a seedy-looking returned to his duty. chap into service, and requested him to show the The story soon got wind, and as it spread through way. He tried to, but after walking half an hour the army it kindled new enthusiasm for the hero he declared his inability (opposite the door of a bar- who had already the heart of every one who knew room) to find the place.
his affability and his pluck. Richard took the hint, and said, “Have a drink?" and all went in. Standing in a martial attitude, the A FRIEND in the army tells a story to this effect : seedy chap tossed off' three fingers." Richard and Quarter-masters in the army have a habit that, Robin took a mild glass of cider, and turning on whenever the men surreptitiously "confiscate” a pig their heels marched off, saying to the seedy man, or a lamb, they seize on it and make use thereof at “We are very much obliged to you.” The face of head-quarters. The boys of the —th Indiana, in a the seedy man and that of the bar-keeper was a recent case, were too fast for their Quarter-master. study; each eyed the other with stupefied wonder | It happened on this wise: While out on picket they captured a nice young dog, dressed it neatly, and they formally installed themselves therein and carbrought it into camp, taking care that Q.-M. should ried on the business of their respective departments get wind of it. It was seized ; and head-quarters without molestation, until one day a wagyish-lookate, as they supposed, some nice fresh lamb. The ing “Down Easter" made his appearance and surjoke was too good to keep, and the Quarter-master reptitiously wrote on the wall over where the pulpit was teased so unmercifully that a special order had had been the following: to be issued to stop the fun.
“It is written that my house shall be called a house of
prayer, but ye have made it a den of thieves." A FIRM of bankers out in Iowa having "closed
A reasonable amount of "hard tack" and coffee out," thus discourse to their delinquent customers :
will be presented to any person who will bring to "Owe no man any thing."-SCRIPTURE.
light the perpetrator of this inexcusable outrage. “To those who owe the undersigned, We now in kindness sny,
Passing up Broadway some short time since, my We need the cash, and want you all To truckle up and pay.
attention was attracted by a very singular and pure
ly accidental collection of occupations in one build“We've waited “lo! these many years,'
ing. The signs across the front stand out like some And dunned you many a time;
great Ogre's eyes, nose, and mouth, ready to gobAnd begged and plead with sighs and tears, ble a person up. The first floor, occupied by the But couldn't get a dime.
“ Broadway Restaurant," where you are taken in,
fed, and prepared; the second floor, occupied by the "Our credit's gone-our cash is out, We can not raise a fip
"Office of the West Point Foundry," where you can To pay our board and laundry bill,
be killed by the latest inventions; the third floor, And have to let 'em rip.'
occupied by the “ Office of Greenwood Cemetery,"
where you can be buried in the most approved style. "No use to talk-the die is cast,
Feed, kill, and bury, all in one building.
CHAPMAN, the Hartford lawyer, has often been
in the Drawer, and here he is again. He was busy “And now you'd better pay us while
with a case at which a lady was present, with whom We're in a placid mood;
he had already something to do as a witness. Her And, if you don't, we vow to you
husband was present-a diminutive, meek, forbearYou'll every one be sued-right away." ing sort of a man-who, in the language of Mr
Chapman, "looked like a rooster just fished out of A Boston religious paper--the Congregationalist a swill-barrel;” while the lady was a large, portly -says that Dr. Gulick, of the Micronesian Mission, woman, evidently the better horse.” As on the when translating selections from the Gospel, was former occasion, she “balked” on the cross-examinlong in doubt what native word to use to signify ation. The lawyer was pressing the question with “ Amen.” After careful inquiry among the natives bis usual urgency, when she said, with vindictive he bit upon what he supposed would most nearly fire flashing from her eyes, give its idea. What was his surprise to find, a while “Mr. Chapman, you needn't think you can catch later, that his synonym for the word which ends the me; you tried that once before." prayer had the equivocal sense of—dry up.
Putting on his most quizzical expression, Mr.
Chapman replied, There is no end to the incidents attending Mor
Madam, I haven't the slightest desire to catch gan's raid. One of our Western friends says:
you; and your husband looks to me as if he was During the recent raid of John Morgan through sorry he had!" this county his men 'dropped a large number of
The husband faintly smiled assent. worn-out horses. These were collected by the authorities, and the best of them were distributed to A SERGEANT-MAJOR in an Indiana regiment, those farmers whose horses had been stolen.
writing to the Drawer, says: A few days afterward a gentleman passing through After the Battle of Stono River Colonel (now. the country was surprised to hear from a neighboring General) G--- D-was expecting the Leg. field the shrill sound of military commands: "Halt! islature to recommend him for promotion to a File left! Forward! March! Guide right!". Brigadier-General. His exploits at the foremen
He supposed that one of the numerous Home- tioned battle had been the theme dilated upon in Guard Companies to which the raid has given birth the columns of a local newspaper, week after week, was going through the usual drill, but he discovered for two months. shortly that it was only a farmer plowing with one One day the Colonel was sitting in his tent readof Morgan's cast-off horses.
ing a late paper, and not seeing his name among
those who it was supposed would wear the star, he This is a great scandal on the officers, and as a shouted, “Nathan! (to an American citizen of Afreward has been offered for the perpetrator perhaps rican descent] find a few more bullets and bulletthe Drawer may catch him :
holes in my coat and vest! That confounded LegisNear Kelly's Ford on the Rappahannock River lature have not yet recommended me!" stands a small brick church, in which the good peo- "Nathan" found the bullets; and in the next ple of the surrounding neighborhood formerly wor- issue of the before - mentioned journal appeared a shiped; but the ravages of war have had their effects glowing account of the narrow escape of the brave here as well as in other parts, and in consequence Colonel, and giving an account of the occurrence. the church has been totally neglected of late. Some In course of time that "confounded Legislature" quarter-masters and commissaries of our corps found opened their eyes to his merits, and he now wears the building very convenient for office purposes, and I the stars.
A BOSTONIAN hopes that the following may be to say that this conduct must cease. You are a man worthy a place in that universal medicine-chest, the of good family, good education, ordinarily a good Drawer :
soldier, neat, cleanly, and genteel in appearance, of A few days since there came into an apothecary- good address, and a valuable man; yet you will get shop in our suburbs a Hibernian of the female drunk. Now I shall tell you, once for all, that" “persuasion," leading by the hand her heir-pre- Here Billy's eyes sparkled, and he interrupted his sumptive-an ill-looking boy of about twelve years superior with, of age and approaching the proprietor, addressed “Beg pardon, Captain, did you say that”-hichim in this wise :
“I was a man of good birth and education?" “ Doctor W- sure the boy I have wid me is Yes, I did." in a bad way, and for a long time before he was so ; "And that I was a good soldier ?" and a woman as knows a great dale told me that if
"Certainly." I wud buy a goat, and give him the milk uv it, it " That usually I-I-am neat and genteel ?" would make a fine bit of a man of him; and sure me "Yes, Billy." ould man was till a great expense of thirteen or " And that I am a valuable man?" fourteen dollars to get a goat and give the milk of it “Yes; but you will get drunk." to the boy. And then another woman, as knows a Billy drew himself up with great dignity, and great dale more, told me that if I gave goat's milk throwing himself on his reserved rights, indignantly to a boy twelve or thirteen years old it would make exclaimed, "Well now, Captain Sumner, do you a blasted thief and robber of him! Now, Doctor, really think Uncle Sam expects-to-to-to get all which of them is right?"
the cardinal virtues for twelve dollars a month ?” THESE puns are not first-rate, but the Drawer The moral of the following is to pay as you go; smiled as they fell in :
and if you can't, don't go at all : Several prominent telegraph managers dining at One of the legal fraternity of the village of Cohoes the “Planter's,” at St. Louis, a few days since, were is a man who not many years ago earned his bread discussing the war news. Mr. W— of Illinois, re- and butter by making boots and shoes; but having marked that Colonel Grierson's raids were wonderful been assured by an itinerant phrenologist that he affairs ; and added, “What do you think, D-?" had mistaken his calling, he applied himself to the addressing Mr. C. D- of Cincinnati, the widely- study of law, and in due time “descended from the known Superintendent of Telegraph.
bench to the bar.” Finding it impossible in his new “Yes, they are," answered D-, quietly; "there vocation to make both ends meet, he was not unfreis nothing equal to them in history. Why, even quently annoyed by brief and uncourteous notes, reSolomon, in all his glory, was not a-raid like one of minding him of long-forgotten accounts that needed these!" I will add that D_"still lives." something to place them in equilibrio. One of these
was (unfortunately, as the sequel will show) thrust ANOTHER: A young lady of our city, noted, as in his coat pocket and forgotten. Having exhausted all her family is, for quiet wit and satire, had been his credit among the tailors of Cohoes, he attemptperusing Les Misérables.
ed to “stick” Messrs. Tape and Linen, of Albany. “Well,” said she, “I have finished it."
A coat having been made according to his order, he “How do you feel ?" I asked.
called to take it away, at the same time remarking "Oh, Less Miserable!" she replied.
that “he would send his check for the amount next
week.” To this the senior partner replied that, “alST. ANTHONY of Minnesota writes to the Drawer, though it might be all right, yet, as he was an entire and tells a good story-none the worse for having stranger, they could not be considered unreasonable appeared in the Drawer ten years ago :
if they required some sort of reference before allowThe late gallant General Sumner, about twenty ing the coat to be taken from the shop.” The proyears ago, was Captain of a company of cavalry, and priety of this was, after a slight affectation of woundcommanded Fort Atkinson, in Iowa.
ed pride, admitted; and our seedy counselor left in One of his men, Billy G-, had received an ex- search of a certificate of solvency. Having finally cellent education, was of a good family, but an un- secured the necessary document, he returned to the fortunate habit of mixing too much water with his scene of his late discomfiture, and with an air of whisky had so reduced him in circumstances that triumph drew an envelope from his pocket, threw it out of desperation he enlisted. Captain S. soon dis on the counter, and requested Mr. Tape to "read covered his qualifications, and as he was a good ac- that.” The latter gentleman complied, and read as countant and excellent penman he made him his follows: confidential clerk.
“Conoes, Oct. 25, 1853. At times the old habit would overcome Billy's "I-M— Esq. good resolutions, and a spree would be the result.
"SIR.-Inclosed find our bill of $43 against you for Captain Sumner, though a rigid disciplinarian, dis- clothing furnished nearly two years ago. Unless paid at liked to punish him severely, and privately gave lection. Yours, etc.,
once it will be placed in the hands of an attorney for col
JONES AND Mason." him much good advice (after a good sobering in the guard-house), receiving in return many thanks and It is needless to say that when the above note was promises of amendment; but his sprees became more handed back with the remark that there had evidentand more frequent.
ly been some mistake, the counselor left the store One day, after Billy had been on a bender, the very abruptly, and in a style that contrasted most Captain determined on giving him a severe repri- ludicrously with that in which he entered. mand, and ordered Billy into his presence before he was fully sober. Billy came with his eyes all blood- Says one of our Western readers and friends : shot and head hanging down, when the Captain ac- We were blessed with a merchant in our business costed him with,
town possessing the euphonious name of Hogg, “So, Sir, you have been drunk again, and I have whose habits were consistent with his name. By
Vol. XXVII.—No. 161.-YY*