diately pay. My hopes of affiftance from Lord Tyrawley was now at an end, as his Lordship was preparing to go to his government at Gibraltar, to which it was become neceffary he should depart with all expedition, as the fortifications wanted confiderable repairs. And indeed, if his Lordship had continued in England, his own love of expence would have put it out of his power to fupport mine.

About this period the youngest Dives, who had been fome time with me was taken ill. And as I loved the children as well as my own, particularly this, he demanded all my care. My much-esteemed Mifs Conway had likewise relapfed. The Marquis was gone to Scarborough to join Mr. Metham, and fee that place. He was however, to return foon, when he was to bring me a recruit of cash, together with intelligence of my lover, and my dear boy, who with my mother remained still at York.

Every thing thus feemed to confpire to make me thoughtful; and as my difpofition feldom retained a proper medium, but was always in the extreme, I was now near falling into a state of dejection; which my intimates were apprehenfive would prove of ferious confequences. When Hugh Dives recovered, I came to town, and took what is generally called a furnished houfe in Frithftreet, Soho. What is meant by a ready furnished

furnished house, is a houfe with a few old chairs, tables, &c. of trifling value, but which greatly enhances the rent.

The town upon my return to London, being quite deferted, and confequently very dull, I took it into my head to go to Tunbridge to vifit the eftate of my progenitor Mr. Seal. I accordingly fent to have lodgings taken for me at Mount Sion; a place, which but for my grandmother's imprudent marriage, would have become in time the property of myself.

Having frequently taken notice of a genteel looking lad, although in rags, who waited upon a poor musician that lived oppofite to me, I ordered O'Bryen to enquire whether he wanted a place. Being almoft ftarved for want of food, and poifoned with dirt, the youth readily answered that he should be glad to leave his prefent fituation. I accordingly hired him. When he came, I found that he was of Bruges in Flanders; which was all the intelligence relative to his hiftory the fervants could get out of him, But there was fomething fo diftinguifhed in his manner and behaviour, that notwithstanding I had engaged him to do the drudgery of the house, my own man and he fhared it between them as it cafually offered. The boy had not been long with me, before he fhewed his gratitude for the comfortable exchange I had offered

offered him by the moft alert industry, and fcrupulous attention to my wishes; and to fuch a height did he carry his zeal to please me, that he seemed almost to pay me divine honours.

Having formed the refolution of setting out for Tunbridge, I thought it would derogate from my confequence were I to travel with less than a fet of horfes. I therefore fent to Tubbs ordering him to add four bright bays to my own two; and I fet off for the Wells, in my coach and fix, with my own. maid and two footmen. I took with me my favourite Virgil, to amufe myself on the road; and enjoying by anticipation the exquifite fatisfaction I fhould reap from the conqueft I was affuredly to make, the next fummer, of fo great and powerful a perfonage as the French King, was as great in my own ima gination as the Queen of Carthage.-O vanity! vanity with what pleafing deliriums is the mind of poor weak women too often filled by thy flattering infpirations !-But ah! how unreal and delufive are thy faireft promifes! And yet, bewitching impoftor! though we are fenfible that the blifs thou doft bestow is tranfitory, and the expectations thou dost fashion uncertain, we hug thee to our bofoms, and driving away reafon and reflection, blindly encourage thy delufions. - have your licence you know for thefe flights. G. A. B.

LET

LETTER

XLI.

Sept. 13, 17.

WHEN

HEN I arrived at the Wells, I met with a mortification, which was rendered the more extreme by the vain imaginations I had given way to during my journey. A proof of the impropriety of indulging thofe waking dreams. I think I never felt fo much from the moft degrading circumftance of my life, as from the humiliating fituation I was thrown into by it.

Mr. St. Leger, whofe intimacy with Mr. Metham, and the long acquaintance that had fubfifted between myfelf and him, placed upon terms of the utmoft freedom and familiarity, was my firft vifitor. As foon as he entered, I ran to receive him in my ufual free way; when I could not help obferving that he accofted me with a cool refpect, in lieu of that gaiety with which he was accuftomed to approach me. Upon my enquiring the reafon, he informed me, that he was paying his addreffes to Mifs Butler, (with whom, as related, I was formerly very intimate) and hoped in a few days to be made happy. That the occafion of his vifit was a request which that lady's mother had to make to me. She intreated to know from me, begging pardon at the fame time for the li

berty

berty fhe was taking, whether I was really married to Mr. Metham, as report faid: If not, although she had a very great regard for me, it would not be in the power of either herself or her daughter to take notice of me. This, he added, would be productive of a very mortifying reception at the rooms, there being a number of Irish nobility and gentry at the Wells, who had been acquainted with me at her houfe in Dublin, and who naturally would follow their example.

This was a thunderbolt to my vanity. I could not sustain the unexpected fhock. All my vain ideas of felf-confequence vanifhed in a moment; and I found myself a defpicable wretch, unworthy the patronage of one of the best of women. As foon as I could recover myself, I thanked him for having faved me, by this timely vifit, from fo public a mortification as I must have experienced had I gone to the rooms. I begged he would give my refpects to Mrs. Butler and her daughter, and inform them, that I was, and ever fhould be, truly fenfible of the marks of friendship with which they had honoured me; and that I fhould ever retain the most grateful fenfe of their goodness. But that I should feel that I was unworthy of ever having been fo happy, could I repay them with deception. I muft therefore candidly acknowledge, that notwitstanding I

VOL. II.

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had