pregnable. We can no longer become enriched for a quarter of an hour; we can no longer succeed in such splendid failures: all our chances of making such a miss have vanished with the last of the Lotteries.

Life will now become a flat, prosaic routine of matter-offact; and sleep itself, erst so prolific of numerical configurations and mysterious stimulants to lottery adventure, will be disfurnished of its figures and figments. People will cease to harp upon the one lucky number suggested in a dream, and which forms the exception, while they are scrupulously silent upon the ten thousand falsified dreams which constitute the rule. Morpheus will stifle Cocker with a handful of poppies, and our pillows will be no longer haunted by the book of numbers.

And who, too, shall maintain the art and mystery of puffing, in all its pristine glory, when the lottery professors shall have abandoned its cultivation? They were the first, as they will assuredly be the last, who fully developed the resources of that ingenious art; who cajoled and decoyed the most suspicious and wary reader into a perusal of their advertisements by devices of endless variety and cunning; who baited their lurking schemes with midnight murders, ghost-stories, crim-cons, bon-mots, balloons, dreadful catastrophes, and every diversity of joy and sorrow, to catch newspaper-gudgeons. Ought not such talents to be encouraged? Verily the abolitionists have much to answer for!

And now, having established the felicity of all those who gained imaginary prizes, let us proceed to show that the equally numerous class who were presented with real blanks have not less reason to consider themselves happy. Most of us have cause to be thankful for that which is bestowed; but we have all, probably, reason to be still more grateful for that which is withheld, and more especially for our being denied the sudden possession of riches. In the Litany, indeed, we call upon the Lord to deliver us "in all time of our wealth;" but how few of us are sincere in deprecating such a calamity! Massinger's Luke, and Ben Jonson's Sir Epicure Mammon, and Pope's Sir

Balaam, and our own daily observation, might convince us that the Devil "now tempts by making rich, not making poor." We may read in the "Guardian" a circumstantial account of a man who was utterly ruined by gaining a capital prize; we may recollect what Dr. Johnson said to Garrick, when the latter was making a display of his wealth at Hampton Court, Ah, David, David! these are the things that make a death-bed terrible ;" we may recall the Scripture declaration, as to the difficulty a rich man finds in entering into the kingdom of Heaven; and, combining all these denunciations against opulence, let us heartily congratulate one another upon our lucky escape from the calamity of a twenty or thirty thousand pound prize! The fox in the fable, who accused the unattainable grapes of sourness, was more of a philosopher than we are generally willing to allow. He was an adept in that species of moral alchemy which turns everything to gold, and converts disappointment itself into a ground of resig nation and content. Such we have shown to be the great lesson inculcated by the Lottery, when rightly contemplated; and, if we might parody M. de Chateaubriand's jingling expression,-"le Roi est mort: vive le Roi !"-we should be tempted to exclaim, "The Lottery is no more: long live the Lottery!"

THE ASS.

MR. Conversation), notices a tract printed in 1595, with

COLLIER, in his "Poetical Decameron" (Third

the author's initials only, A. B., entitled "The Noblenesse of the Asse; a work rare, learned, and excellent." He has selected the following pretty passage from it: "He (the ass) refuseth no burden: he goes whither he is sent, without any contradiction. He lifts not his foote against any one; he bytes not; he is no fugitive, nor malicious affected. He doth all things in good sort, and to his liking that hath

cause to employ him. If strokes be given him, he cares not for them; and, as our modern poet singeth,j sumir s iraut 287 226 udt “Thou wouldst (perhaps) he should become thy fœe,

And to that end dost beat him many times:

He cares not for himselfe, much less thy blow.

1

Certainly Nature, foreseeing the cruel usage which this useful servant to man should receive at man's hand, did prudently in furnishing him with a tegument impervious to ordinary stripes. The malice of a child or a weak hand can make feeble impressions on him. His back offers no mark to a puny foeman. To a common whip or switch his hide presents an absolute insensibility. You might as well pretend to scourge a schoolboy with a tough pair of leather breeches on. His jerkin is well fortified, and therefore the costermongers, “between the years 1790 and 1800," did more politicly than piously in lifting up a part of his upper garment. I well remember that beastly and bloody custom. I have often longed to see one of thoses refiners in discipline himself at the cart's tail, with just such a convenient spot laid bare to the tender mercies of the whipster. But, since Nature has resumed her rights, it is to be hoped that this patient creature does not suffer to extremities; and that, to the savages who still belabour his poor carcase with their blows (considering the sort of anvil they are laid upon), he might in some sort, if he could speak, exclaim with the philosopher, "Lay on : you beat but upon the case of Anaxarchus.” fet b Contemplating this natural safeguard, this fortified exterior, it is with pain I view the sleek, foppish, combed, and curried person of this animal as he is disnaturalized at watering-places, &c., where they affect to make a palfry of him. Fie on all such sophistications! It will never do, master groom: Something of this honest, shaggy exterior will still peep up in spite of you, his good, rough, native, pine-apple coating. You cannot "refine a scorpion into a fish, though you rinse it and scour it with ever so cleanly cookery."*

* Milton, from memory...!»{"

f

a The modern poet quoted by AI B. proceeds to celebrate a virtue for which no one to this day had been aware that the ass was remarkable :

,907 vilt smoood binoids of eqroq deblow godT · *
"One other gift this beast hath as his owne, bEA

P

Wherewith the rest could not be furnished H
On man himself the same was not bestowne:

eidt doTo wit, on him is ne'er engendered outs【 vlustro)
bibbs The hateful vermine that doth teare the skin
And to the bode [body] doth make his passage in

And truly, when one thinks on the suit of impenetrable armour with which Nature (like Vulcan to another Achilles) has provided him, these subtile enemies to our repose would have shown some dexterity in getting into his quarters. Así the bogs of Ireland by tradition expel toads and reptilesy he may well defy these small deer in his fastnesses. It seems the latter had not arrived at the exquisite policy adopted by the human vermin. between 1790 and 1800.8I

**

་

But the most singular and delightful gift of the asso according to the writer of this pamphlet, is his voice, thed "goodly, sweet, and continual brayings" of which, ff whereof they forme a melodious and proportionable kinded ofa musicke," ,"seem to have affected him with no ordinary pleasure." Nor thinke I," he adds, that any of our i immoderate musitians can deny but that their song is full of exceeding pleasure to be heard; because therein is to bed discerned both concord, discord, singing in the meane, thes beginning to sing in large compasse, then following into rise and fall, the halfe-note, whole note, musicke of fived voices, firme singing by four voices, three together, or one voice and a halfe. Then their variable contrarieties t amongst them, when one delivers forth a long tenor or fars short, the pausing for time, breathing in measure, breakingw the minim or very least moment of time. Last of all, tod heare the musicke of five or six voices chaunged to som many of asses is amongst them to heare a song of worldw without end."1602 smiler? 201609 9kpts sniq There is no accounting for ears, or for that laudable it enthusiasm with which an author is tempted to invest aco favourite subject with the most incompatible perfections:

I should otherwise, for my own taste, have been inclined rather to have given a place to these extraordinary musicians at that banquet of nothing-less-than-sweet-sounds, imagined by old Jeremy Collier (Essays, 1698, part ii. on Music), where, after describing the inspiriting effects of martial music in a battle, he hazards an ingenious conjecture, whether a sort of anti-music might not be invented, which should have quite the contrary effect of “sinking the spirits, shaking the nerves, curdling the blood, and inspiring despair and cowardice and consternation. "Tis probable," he says, "the roaring of lions, the warbling of cats and screech-owls, together with a mixture of the howling of dogs, judiciously imitated and compounded, might go a great way in this invention." The dose, we confess. is pretty potent, and skilfully enough prepared. But what shall we say to the Ass of Silenus, who, if we may trust to classic lore, by his own proper sounds, without thanks to cat or screech-owl, dismayed and put to rout a whole army of giants? Here was anti-music with a vengeance; a whole Pan-Dis-Harmonicon in a single lungs of leather!

But I keep you trifling too long on this asinine subject. I have already passed the Pons Asinorum, and will desist. remembering the old pedantic pun of Jem Boyer, my schoolmaster,

“Ass in præsenti seldom makes a WISE MAN in futuro.”

WHAT

IN RE SQUIRRELS.

THAT is gone with the cages with the climbing squirrel, and bells to them, which were formerly the indispensable appendage to the outside of a tinman's shop, and were, in fact, the only live signs? One, we believe, still hangs out on Holborn; but they are fast vanishing with the good old modes of our ancestors. They seem to have been superseded by that still more ingenious refinement of modern humanity,—the tread-mill; in which human squir