us.

As years pass on, the Divine Spirit touches them with a wider sweep and a firmer hand, till at last the confusion is reduced, the work is completed, and the instrument is taken into the choir of heaven, where not a note jars in the expression of everlasting truth. But all this is according to each man's measure. In one, there may be a thousand answering notes; in another, but ten; in another, but five. Yet, many or few, these are the real possessions of a man in life : these his tokens of progress: these his own treasures, of which neither time nor eternity can rob him. And according to these, so is the man. In feeling, in sympathy, in power for good, he is as he has grown to be. Ask the poor victim of suffering and pain where lies the charm in that face, pale and wan, and with no outward beauty, which above all others he loves to see bending over his bed, and ministering to him. Others bring gifts; she, it may be, can bring none others speak many words of studied kindness; she, perhaps, speaks but little and seldom but there is that in the calm face, in the ordinary casual word, in the quiet and gentle help, which is better, and more precious, and more powerful, and more beloved, than all on earth besides. Yes; that face has known sorrow: that sympathy, flowing so still, comes from the deep fountains of personal suffering; that one, having suffered, knows how to succour them that suffer:she is gifted with a power which angel never inherited, and which the Son of God left heaven to obtain.

Yes, brethren, this was the power with which it was His aim to clothe Himself when He became man. He can be touched with a feeling of our infirmities not merely because, as God, He knows them-and not one pang of the suffering heart is hidden from Him-but far more because, as our Brother, He has felt them: He Himself has been “a Man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief".

HUMOROUS PROSE SELECTIONS.

REPORT OF A LAW-SUIT-GOODY

LAPSTONE.-(Smith.)

GRIM versus

WHAT a profound study is the law! and how difficult to fathom! Well, let us consider the law: for our laws are very considerable, both in bulk and numbers; according as the statutes declare,—considerandi, considerando, considerandum, —and are not to be meddled with by those who don't understand them.

Law always expresses itself with true grammatical precision, never confounding moods, cases, or genders, except, indeed, when a woman happens accidentally to be slain, then a verdict is always brought in man-slaughter. The essence of the law is altercation; for the law can altercate, fulminate, deprecate, irritate, and go on at any rate. "Your son follows the law, I think, Sir Thomas?" "Yes, madam, but I am afraid he will never overtake it." A man following the law is like two boys running round a table; he follows the law, and the law follows him. However, if you take away the whereofs, whereases, wherefores, and notwithstandings, the whole mystery vanishes; it is then plain and simple.

Now, the quintessence of the law has, according to its name, five parts: the first is the beginning, or incipiendum; the second, the uncertainty, or dubitandum; the third, delay, or puzzle-endum; fourthly, replication without endum; and fifthly, monstrum et horrendum: all which are clearly exemplified in the following case- -GOODY GRIM AGAINST LAPSTONE. This trial happened in a certain town, which, for reasons, shall be nameless, and is as follows:-Goody Grim inhabited an almshouse, No. 2; Will Lapstone, a superannuated cobbler, lived in No. 3; and a certain Jew pedlar, who happened to pass through the town where those alms

houses were situated, could only think of number One. Goody Grim was in the act of killing one of her own proper pigs; but the animal, disliking the ceremony, burst from her hold, ran through the semicircular legs of the aforesaid Jew,-knocked him in the mud,-ran back to Will Lapstone's the cobbler,-upset a quart bottle full of gin belonging to the said Lapstone, and took refuge in the cobbler's state bed.

The parties being, of course, in the most opulent circumstances, consulted counsel learned in the law. The result was, that Goody Grim was determined to bring an action against Lapstone "for the loss of her pig with a curly tail"; and Lapstone to bring an action against Goody Grim for the loss of a quart bottle full of Hollands gin; and Mordecai to bring an action against them both for "de losh of a teetotum dat fell out of his pocket in the rencounter". They all delivered their briefs to counsel, before it was considered they were all parties, and no witnesses. But Goody Grim, like a wise old lady as she was, now changed her battery, determined to bring an action against Lapstone, and bind over Mordecai as an evidence.

The indictment set forth, "That you, Lapstone, not having the fear of the assizes before your eyes, but being moved by pig, and instigated by pruinsence, did, on the first day of April, a day sacred in the annals of law, steal, pocket, hide, and crib, divers, that is to say, five hundred hogs, sows, boars, pigs, and porkers, with curly tails; and did secrete the said five hundred hogs, sows, boars, pigs and porkers, with curly tails, in the said Lapstone's bed, against the peace of our lady the Queen, her crown, and dignity."

Mordecai was examined by Counsellor Puzzle. "Well, sir, what are you?"

"I sells old clo', and sealing-vax, and puckles."

"I did not ask you what you sold; I ask you what you

are?"

"I am about five and forty."

"I did not ask your age; I ask

"I am a Jew."

66

you what you are?"

Why couldn't you tell me that at first? Well, then, sir, if you are a Jew, tell me what you know of this affair."

"As I vas a valking along

"Man-I don't want to know where you were walking." "Vell, vell, vell! As I vas a valking along ".

"So you will walk along, in spite of all that can be said." "Plesh ma heart, you frighten me out of my vits. As I vas a valking along, I seed de unclean animal coming towards me-and so, says I-O father Abraham, says I".

"Father Abraham, sir, is no evidence."

"You must let me tell my story my own vay, or I cannot tell it at all. As I vas a valking along, I seed de unclean animal coming towards me-an so, says I-O Father Abraham, says I, here comes de unclean animal towards me; and he runned between my legs, and upshet me in the mut."

"Now, do you mean to say, upon your oath, that that little animal had the power to upset you in the mud?" "I vill take my oash dat he upshet me in te mut." "And pray, sir, on what side did you fall?”

"On de mutty side."

"I mean, on which of your own sides did "I fell on my left side."

66

Now, on your oath, was it your left side?"

"I vill take my oash, it vas my left side."

And, pray, what did you do when you fell down?"
I got up again as fast as I could.”

Perhaps you could tell me whether the pig had a curly

tail?"

"I vill take my oash his tail vas so curly as ma peard."

66

And, pray, where were you going when this happened?" "I vas going to de sign of de Goose and Gridiron."

"Now, on your oath, what has a goose to do with a gridiron ?"

"I don't know, only it vas de sign of de house. And all more vat I know vas, dat I lose an ivory tee-totum out of ma pocket."

66

Oh, you lost a tee-totum, did you ? I thought we should bring you to something at last. My lord, I beg leave to take an exception to this man's evidence: he does not come into court with clean hands."

"How de mischief should I, when I have been polishing my goods all morning!"

"Now, my lord, your lordship is aware that the word teetotum is derived from the Latin terms of te and tutum, which mean keep yourself safe'. And this man, but for my sagacity, observation, and so forth, would have kept himself safe; but now he has, as the learned Lord Verulam expresses it, 'let the cat out of the bag".

"I vill take ma oash I had no cat in ma bag."

"My lord, by his own confession, he was about to vend a tee-totum. Now, my lord, and gentlemen of the jury, it is my duty to point out to you that a tee-totum is an unlawful machine, made of ivory, with letters printed upon it, for the purpose of gambling! Now, your lordship knows that the Act, commonly known by the name of the Little-go Act,' expressly forbids all games of chance whatever-whether put, or whist, or marbles, or swabs, or dumps, or chuckfarthing, or tee-totum, or what not; and therefore I do contend that this man's evidence is contra bones mores, and he is consequently non compos testimoniœ.”

Counsellor Botherem then rose up :-"My lord, and gentlemen of the jury, my learned friend, Puzzle, has in a most facetious manner endeavoured to cast a slur on the highly honourable evidence of the Jew merchant. And I do contend, that he who buys and sells is bonâ fide inducted into all the mysteries of merchandise; ergo, he who merchandises is, to all intents and purposes, a merchant. My learned friend, in the twistings and turnings of his argument in handling the tee-totum, can only be called obiter dictum; he is playing, my lord, a losing game. Gentlemen, he has told you the origin, use, and abuse of the tee-totum ; but, gentlemen, he has forgot to tell you what that great luminary of the law, the late learned Coke, has said on the subject, in a case exactly similar to this, in the 234th folio volume of the "Abridgment of the Statutes," page 1349, where he thus lays down the law, in the case of Hazard versus Blacklegs :Gamblendum consistet, enactum gamblendi, sed non evendum macheni placendi'. My lord, I beg leave to say, that if I prove my client was in the act of vending, and not playing with the said instrument-the tee-totum-I humbly presume that all my learned friend has said will come to the ground."