An Outline of Humor: Being a True Chronicle from Prehistoric Ages to the Twentieth CenturyCarolyn Wells |
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Page 6
... asked at which end of the car she should get off . " Either end , madame , " he responded , " both ends stop . " An extreme specimen is the man who told the story of a burning house- " I saw a fellow up on the roof , " he related ...
... asked at which end of the car she should get off . " Either end , madame , " he responded , " both ends stop . " An extreme specimen is the man who told the story of a burning house- " I saw a fellow up on the roof , " he related ...
Page 8
... asking directions , ma'am , or just telling me your troubles ? " The incongruity may be merely a collocution of words . Mark Twain described Turner's Slave Ship as " A tortoise- shell cat having a fit in a platter of tomatoes . 99 In a ...
... asking directions , ma'am , or just telling me your troubles ? " The incongruity may be merely a collocution of words . Mark Twain described Turner's Slave Ship as " A tortoise- shell cat having a fit in a platter of tomatoes . 99 In a ...
Page 9
... asked the definition of a man - ' Tis that which we all see and know ! and one better apprehends what it is by acquaintance , than I can inform him by description . It is indeed a thing so versatile and multiform , appearing in so many ...
... asked the definition of a man - ' Tis that which we all see and know ! and one better apprehends what it is by acquaintance , than I can inform him by description . It is indeed a thing so versatile and multiform , appearing in so many ...
Page 32
... had been married for a considerable time . " When the end of the tenth year of their marriage was approaching , they both went to the Rabbi , and asked him for his advice . The Rabbi listened with great sympathy 32 AN OUTLINE OF HUMOR.
... had been married for a considerable time . " When the end of the tenth year of their marriage was approaching , they both went to the Rabbi , and asked him for his advice . The Rabbi listened with great sympathy 32 AN OUTLINE OF HUMOR.
Page 33
... asked him for his forgiveness and blessing , which he readily accorded them . And , indeed , the Rabbi's blessing had an excellent result . For after the lapse of some time , they both enjoyed the happiness of fondling a bright little ...
... asked him for his forgiveness and blessing , which he readily accorded them . And , indeed , the Rabbi's blessing had an excellent result . For after the lapse of some time , they both enjoyed the happiness of fondling a bright little ...
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Common terms and phrases
Æsop Akhoond answered Apuleius Artotrogus asked Bacchus beautiful began Brer Brer Rabbit brother burlesque Calandrino called Charon Cogia cried croak Cunégonde daughter dead dear Don Quixote door drink eggs epigrams Euclio eyes Falstaff Fanfreluche father flea fool frog gave give hand hatchet head hear heard heart heaven Heracles horse humor humorist husband king koash lady laugh Lewis Carroll live look Lord married matter mediæval Megadorus mind never night nose Pilpay poet Polonius poor pray Pumpkin Pyrgopolinices quoth replied round Sancho Panza satire sleep song soul stories sure sweet tell thee There's thing thou thought told took Trimalchio Trissotin true Twas Vadius Vers de Société verse wife wine wish woman words write wrote young
Popular passages
Page 292 - Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man; and writing an exact man. And therefore, if a man write little, he had need have a great memory; if he confer little, he had need have a present wit: and if he read little, he had need have much cunning, to seem to know that he doth not. Histories make men wise; poets witty; the mathematics subtile; natural philosophy deep; moral grave; logic and rhetoric able to contend.
Page 372 - Rain influence, and judge the prize Of wit or arms, while both contend To win her grace, whom all commend. There let Hymen oft appear In saffron robe, with taper clear, And pomp, and feast, and revelry, With mask and antique pageantry ; Such sights as youthful poets dream On summer eves by haunted stream. Then to the well-trod stage anon, If Jonson's learned sock be on, Or sweetest Shakespeare, Fancy's child, Warble his native wood-notes wild.
Page 370 - Why so pale and wan, fond lover? Prithee, why so pale? Will, when looking well can't move her, Looking ill prevail? Prithee, why so pale?
Page 491 - WERTHER had a love for Charlotte Such as words could never utter ; Would you know how first he met her? She was cutting bread and butter. Charlotte was a married lady, And a moral man was Werther, And for all the wealth of Indies, Would do nothing for to hurt her. So he sighed and pined and ogled, And his passion boiled and bubbled, Till he blew his silly brains out, And no more was by it troubled. Charlotte, having seen his body Borne before her on a shutter, Like a well-conducted person, Went on...
Page 382 - Three poets, in three distant ages born, Greece, Italy, and England, did adorn. The first, in loftiness of thought surpassed; The next, in majesty; in both the last. The force of Nature could no further go; To make a third, she joined the former two.
Page 373 - And ever, against eating cares, Lap me in soft Lydian airs, Married to immortal verse, Such as the meeting soul may pierce In notes, with many a winding bout Of linked sweetness long drawn out, With wanton heed and giddy cunning, The melting voice through mazes running, Untwisting all the chains that tie The hidden soul of harmony ; 8.
Page 305 - Go, soul, the body's guest, Upon a thankless errand ! Fear not to touch the best, The truth shall be thy warrant Go, since I needs must die, And give the world the lie.
Page 278 - Yet the man thus corrupt, thus despicable, makes himself necessary to the prince that despises him, by the most pleasing of all qualities, perpetual gaiety, by an unfailing power of exciting laughter...
Page 687 - Then Abner Dean of Angel's raised a point of order — when A chunk of old red sandstone took him in the abdomen, And he smiled a kind of sickly smile, and curled up on the floor, And the subsequent proceedings interested him no more.
Page 306 - Who, in their greatest cost, Seek nothing but commending: And if they make reply, Then give them all the lie. Tell zeal it wants devotion; Tell love it is but lust; Tell time it is but motion; Tell flesh it is but dust: And wish them not reply, For thou must give the lie.