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procured him from many the title of burning, and throat choking with the modern Æsop. One evening he indignation," Mr. Cherry spoke the was rattling and sparkling away, with author.”—“Indeed, sir!" replied the least crooked leg of the two the son of Mars; “ I'm afraid not, thrown over the other (a piece of sir-I'm afraid not; and by St. pardonable policy), when the con- Patrick and the seven holy stars ! if versation happened to turn upon he dared to-I-eh-" At. this dancing. A wag in the company, who moment he had found the right place, knew his good humor, asked him and the words met his eye : his “if he was fond of the amusement ?” features instantly relaxed into a co_“Yes,” he replied, “and mean to mical smile, and, looking at Row, he subscribe to the winter-balls.". exclaimed, “By the powers ! there's “What! with that leg ? "_" Ay, two of us, sure enough! Mr. Clerwith this leg; and, notwithstanding ry, sir, was correct, and I beg you your sneering, I'll bet you a rump ten thousand pardins for this intruand dozen, there's a worse leg in sion :” saying which he returned the the room.”'_“Done, done!" cried book, made an elegant bow, and a dozen voices. Amyas shook the retreated. hands of each. “Now,” said his antagonist, with a smile of confidence, come forward, gentlemen, Galway, when representing the and let Mr. Griffiths point out such Player King (in Hamlet), stepped another limb as that.” “Here it is,” forward to repeat the lineshe replied ; and throwing off his left

“ For us, and for our trage-dy, leg, raised his right in the air, immea

Here stooping to your clemen-cy, surably more hideous than the other, We beg your hearing patient-ly." A general laugh was the result, and the society decided he had fairly Here he should have rested with won his wager.

Spakspeare ; but genius was on the

wing, and he could not bring the THE TWO “WAT TYLERS.

eagle-bird to earth; therefore he Mr. Tyler had a brother Watkins, continued-who commanded in a corps of volun

“ And if on this we may rely, teers, and was invariably present in

Why, we'll be with you by and by.” our boxes. This gave rise to a droll At which Whitely, who lay on the coincidence : Cherry was playing ground, as Hamlet, snarled out, Lingo in the “Agreeable Surprise

loud enough to be heard by all the one evening; and when lic came to audiencethe question to Cowslip—“ You

* And if on pay-day you rely, never heard of the great heroes of

Take care I stop no sala-ry;" antiquity, Homer, Heliogabalus, Moses, and Wat Tyler ?” the audi- Thus justifying the rhyme by a very ence laughed loudly, and turned serious reason. their eyes upon Captain Wat Tyler in the boxes. Cherry was known to be in the habit of introducing

An old gentleman in the company jokes of his own; and the gallant by the name of Weeks, who played oflicer concluding this to be such a the Friar in Romeo and Juliet (and one, left his seat when the act was whose body seemed to resemble a over and went behind the scenes, Norwegian deal, never fit for use where he desired Dick Row, our till it had had a good soaking), on prompter, to let him look at the book. arriving at the concluding speech, He was greatly'agitated, and Row which, as it contained a moral, was in an instant surinised the cause, never omitted in the country, “Sir," said he, as the captain turned ?

" From such sad feuds what dire misfortunes over the leaves hurriedly, bis face flow,


16 woe.”

espied a carpenter behind the scenes, the tankard, and Weeks slowly artivery cautiously, but decidedly, ap- culatedproaching a tankard of ale, with

“ Whate'er the cause which he had been solacing himself during the evening, in order, as he (Here the fellow raised his hand) used to say, “ to get mellow in the

" the sure effect is character. »

The tankard was placed in a convenient niche, with a The knight of the hammer had good draught at its bottom; and clenched the pewter-Weeks at the whenever he was on, his eye would same instant staggered off, wrenchglance off, to watch over its safety. ing the jeopardised liquid from his Being a little tipsied, he was some- grasp,--the friar tucked it under his what stupefied at the treachery of arm, and popping his head on at the the varlet ; and fixing his eyes, cat- wing, with a significant nod, shouted a-mountain like, on him, momenta- the last word, ' woe!” at which the rily forgot his audience in himself, curtain fell, amidst a roar of laughter who interpreting this as a piece of -a termination very rarely contemdeep acting, began to applaud. The plated to the “Tragedy of Tragecarpenter was now within a step of dies.”


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I Am any man's suitor,
If any will be my tutor :
Some say this life is pleasant,

Some think it speedeth fast :
In time there is no present,
In eternity no future-

In eternity no past.
We laugh, wc cry, we are born, we die,
Who will riddle me the how and the why ?
The bulrush nods unto its brother,
The wheat-ears whisper to each other :
What is it they say? What do they there?
Why two ar:dł two make four? Why round is not square ?
Why the rock stands still, and the light clouds fly?
Why the heavy oak groans, and the white willows sigh?
Why deep is not high, and high is not deep?
Whether we wake, or whether we sleep?
Whether we sleep, or wheiber we die ?
How you are ou ?
Who will riddle me the hou and the why ?

The world is somewhat, it goes on somehow,
But what is the meaning of then and nou?

I feel there is something; but how and what?
I know there is somewhat, but what and why?
I cannot tell if that somewhat be l.

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The little bird pipeth “ Why, why!'
In the summer-woods when the sun falls low;
And the great bird sits on the opposite bough,
And stares in his face and shouts - How, how!"
And the black owl scuds down the mellow twilight,
And chants" How, how!” the whole of the night.
Why the life goes when the blood is spilt?

What the life is ? Where the soul may lie ?
Why a church is with a steeple built,
And a house with a chimney-pot?
Who will riddle me the how and the what ?

Who will riddle me the welat and the why?


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you !

Mr. John Smith is now a bachelor, oily man,” five feet and a half in his on the young side of forty. He is shoes; much given to poetry, pein the prime of that happy period, destrianism, whim, whistling, cigars, ere the freedom of single blessedness and sonnets ; amorous,'

" as the has deteriorated into formality, that poets say, of umbrageousness in the “ last infirmity of noble” bachelors. country, and umbrellas in the town; Caps have been, and are now, set at rather bald, and addicted to Burton him ; but he is too shy a bird to be ale ; and a lover of silence and afcaught in nets of muslin, or impri- ternoon siestas-indeed, he is much soned by the fragile meshes of given to sleep, which, as he says, is Mechlin lace. Widows wonder but a return in kind ; for sleep was that he does not marry ; wives think given to man to refresh his body he should ; and several disinterested and keep his spirits in peace ; inmaiden ladies advise him to think dulgences these which have anyseriously of something of that sort; thing but a marrying look : so that and he, always open to conviction, no unwilling Daphne has lost a promises that he will do something willing Damon in my duodecimo of that kind. In fact, he has gone friend. It is too manifest that he so far as to confess that it is melan- prefers liberty, and lodgings for a choly, when he sneezes in the night, single gentleman, to the “ Hail, to have no one, night-capped and wedded love !” of the poet of Panigh, to say “ God bless If radise—a sort of clergyman “trithe roguish leer of his eye, in these umphale" to which his ear is most moments of compunction, means unorthodoxically deaf when time is anything, I am rather more than called. He has even gone so far half inclined to doubt his sincerity. as to compare good and bad marOne argument which he urges riages wi h two very remarkable against committing matrimony is results in chemical experiment, by certainly undeniable--that there are which, in one instance, charcoal is Smiths enough in the world, without converted into diamond, and in the his aiding and abetting their in- other, diamond is deflagrated into crease and multiplication : he says charcoal. The fortunate Benedict he shall wait till the words of Sam- marries charcoal, which, after a pauel, “ Now there was no Smith tient process, proves a diamond ; found throughout all Israel," are the unfortunate husband weds a diaalmost applicable throughout all mond, which, tried in the fire of England : and then he may, per- adversity, turns out charcoal. Yet haps, marry. Smiths, he he is not unalive to those soft imsays, are as plentiful as blackber- pressions which betoken a sensitive ries. Throw a cat out of every nature. He has been twice in other window, from one end to the love ; thrice to the dome of St. other of this metropolis, and it would Paul's with the three sisters Simpfall on the head of one Smith. Rush son, and once to Richmond by wasuddenly round a corner, and knock ter with a Miss Robinson, in May, down the first man you meet, he is that auspicious month, dedicated to a Smith ; he prostrates a second, love and lettuces. These are perthe second a third, the third a fourth haps the only incidents in his un

the ninth a tenth-they are checkered life which approach the all and severally Smiths."

romantic and the sentimental ; yet I am indeed afraid that he is irre- he has passed through the ordeal coverably a bachelor, for several unsinged at heart, and is still a bareasons which I shall mention. He chelor. He was, at one time, pasis, at this time, "a little, round, sionately partial to music and mut

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ton-chops, muffins and melancholy, To sum up the more prominent predilections much cultivated by an points of his character in few words. inherent good taste, and an ardent As he is a great respecter of himlove of the agreeable ; yet he has self, so he is a great respecter of all taken to himself no one to do his persons in authority : his bow to a mutton and music, no one to soften beadle on Sundays is indeed a leshis melancholy and spread his muf- son in humility. Being a sincere fins. It is unaccountable ; the la- lover of his country, he is also a dies say so, and I agree with them. sincere lover of himself : he prefers

I have mentioned “ the things he roast-beef and plum-pudding to any is inclined to ; " I must now speci- of your foreign kickshaws ; and fy “ those he has no mind to.' His drinks the Colonnade champagne antipathies are tight boots and bad when he can, to encourage tho ale—two of the evils of life (which growth of English gooseberries ; is at best but of a mingled yarn) for smokes largely, to contribute his which he has an aversion almost modicum to the home-consumption ; amounting to the impatient. His pays all government demands with dislike to a scold is likewise most a cheerfulness unusual and altogeremarkable, perhaps peculiar to ther perplexing to tax-gatherers ; himself; for I do not remember to and subscribes to a poor hospital have noticed the antipathy in any (two guineas annually — nothing one beside.

A relation is, to be more.) In short, if he has not sure, linked to a worthy descendant every virtue under heaven, it is no of Xantippe ; and this perhaps is fault of Mr. Smith. The virtues, the key to his objections to the pad- he has been heard to say, are such lock of matrimony.

high-priced luxuries, that a man of It is the bounden duty of a biog- moderate income cannot afford to rapher (and I consider this paper to indulge much in them. be biographical) to give in as few These are Mr. John Smith's words as possible, the likeness of good qualities : if he has failings, his hero. Two or three traits are they “lean to virtue's side,” but do as good as two or three thousand, not much affect his equilibrium : where volume-making is not the he is a perpendicular man in general, prime consideration. He is eccen- and not tall enough in his own contric, but without a shadow of turn- ceit to stoop when he passes under ing. He is sensitive to excess; Temple Bar. If he is singular, he for though no one ever has hörse- lays it to the accident of his birth : whipped him, I have no doubt if he was the seventh Smith of a either A or B should, he would seventh Smith. This fortuitous cawince amazingly under the inflic- tenation in the links of the long tion, and be very much hurt in his chain of circumstance, which has feelings. Indeed, he does not me- before now bestowed on a fool the rit any such notice from any one ; reputation of “a wise man," only for he has none of that provoking rendered him, as he is free to conirascibility generally attendant on fess, an odd man. His pursuits genius (for he is a genius, as I have indeed of late been numerous have shown, and shall presently beyond mention, and being taken show.) He was never known to up in whimsies, ended in oddities. have been engaged in more than As I have said, he wrote verses, one literary altercation ; then he and they were thought by some endeavored, but in vain, to convince people to be very odd and unachis grocer, who had beaten his boy countable. He lost a Miss to the blueness of stone-blue for who was dear to him, in trinket exspelling sugar without an h, that he penses more especially, through a was assuredly not borne out in his point of poetical etiquette certainly orthography by Johnson and Walker, very unpardonahle. In concl.

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addressed to that amiable spinster “ Nature has made us 2, but Love shall make and deep-dyed bas bleu, he had oc

us 1;

1 mind, 1 soul, 1 heart," &c. casion to use the words one and two, and either from the ardor of This reminded the learned lady too haste, or the inconsiderateness of irresistibly of a catalogue of salelove, or perhaps from the narrow- l warming-pan, 2 stoves, 1 stewpan, ness of his note-paper, he penned 1 smoke-jack, &c. and she dismissthe

ed him in high dudgeon.


passage thus :


This unfortunate gentleman was The Necessity of Atheism, for which undoubtedly a man of genius-full he was expelled the University. of ideal beauty and enthusiasm. This event proved fatal to his And yet there was some defect in prospects in life ; and the treatment his understanding, by which he he received from his family was subjected himself to the accusation too harsh to win him from error. of atheism. In his dispositions he His father, however, in a short time is represented to have been ever relented, and he was received home; calm and amiable ; and but for his but he took so little trouble to conmetaphysical errors and reveries, ciliate the esteem of his friends, and a singular incapability of con- that he found the house uncomfortceiving the existing state of things able, and left it. He then went to as it practically affects the nature London, where he eloped with a and condition of man, to have pos- young lady to Gretna Green. Their sessed many of the gentlest quali- united ages amounted to thirty-two ; ties of humanity. He highly ad- and the match being deemed unmired the endowments of Lord By- suitable to his rank and prospects, ron, and in return was esteemed by it so exasperated his father, that he his Lordship ; but even had there broke of all communication with been neither sympathy nor friend- him. ship between them, his premature After their marriage the young fate could not but have saddened couple resided some time in EdinByron with no common sorrow. burgh. They then passed over to

Mr. Shelley was some years Ireland, which, being in a state of younger than his noble friend; he disturbance, Shelly took a part in was the eldest son of Sir Timothy politics, more reasonable than might Shelley, Bart., of Castle Goring, have been expected. He inculcatSussex. At the age of thirteen he ed moderation was sent to Eton, where he rarely About this time he became demixed in the common amusements voted to the cultivation of his poeof the other boys ; but was of a shy, tical talents; but his works were reserved disposition, fond of soli- sullied with the erroneous inductude, and made few friends. He tions of an understanding which, inwas not distinguished for his profi- asmuch as he regarded all the exciency in the regular studies of the isting world in the wrong, must be school ; on the contrary, he neg- considered as having been either lected them for German and Che- shattered or defective. mistry. His abilities were superior, His rash marriage proved, of but deteriorated by eccentricity. course, an unhappy one. After the At the age of sixteen he was sent birth of two children, a separation, to the University of Oxford, where by mutual consent, took place, and he soon distinguished himself by Mrs. Shelley committed suicide. publishing a pamphlet, under the He then married a daughter of absurd and world-defying title of Mr. Godwin, the author of Caleb

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